JUST AS I AM THOU WILT RECEIVE

Fused Glass

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

Times are still difficult; we've all noticed that.  In response, I've been reading books by Dr. Mary Pipher again (Posts 3/9/19, 3/18/19).  One  I reread is Women Rowing North: Navigating Life's Currents and Flourishing as We Age.  It's not overtly devotional or even necessarily religious.  She writes for a broad audience.. The currents she describes are there to navigate no matter what.  For me, this writer's words create ripples like a small stone tossed into the pool of my own undulating thoughts. 

A psychologist, Dr. Pipher says that with each new stage of life we outgrow the strategies that worked before. I thought of how easy it was to feel exuberant at age twenty, how unbounded the future seemed and how for the young good health is so often taken for granted.  Not so at my age now; I do need new strategies.  She suggests being kinder and gentler with ourselves and others.

Some of the problems we face are luxuries: "I have a vacation, where shall I go?"  Some not: "My friend has cancer.  Will he survive?"  Or more nebulous: "Has my life been worthwhile so far?  Am I loving? Or loved?"  Dr. Pipher realizes that what she wants is for her soul to expand as her body ages. This is important at every decade.  

 

Dr. Pipher says that when she works with trauma victims she asks, "When you look back, what are you able to be proud of?"  Everyone has something:  "I retained my essential nature."  "I've been able to tell my story." "I didn't give up."  "I fought back." "I'm alive."  When we have to confront difficult emotions the most important thing may be that we learn to grant ourselves mercy.  I think of William Blake: 

    For Mercy has a human heart;  Pity, a human face. 

Many of us feel young until we suffer a major health crisis, or our life partner does.  My father said to me, "I didn't feel old until your mama died."  He was 84 when he said this.  "As we age," Dr. Pipher says, "our bodies, our sexuality, and our minds are devalued."  True, even in 2022, maybe especially for women.  Sometimes ageism seems more trying than aging.  Yet research shows that as the years accumulate many men and women are deeply content, have better mental health, find an ability to manage their own emotions and help others do the same, and excel at intimate conversations.  I think this means that we learn acceptance.  If some fact in our life is unacceptable to us we have no peace until we accept it.  We Christians learn acceptance from our Lord.  I remember singing "Just as I Am" at my Grandma's Methodist funeral, and at many funerals since.  Verse 4 reads:   

 

Just as I am, thou wilt receive,
wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve;
because thy promise I believe,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.

Eventually, one way or another, we will say goodbye to everyone we love. Our goodbye or theirs.  As we cross each milestone we need better navigational skills, but fortunately we have more experience acquiring them.  We are able to face life as it is and build happiness from there.  Hospice teaches that there are five essential conversations:  "Please forgive me."   "I forgive you."   "I love you."  "Thank you."  "Goodbye."  There is no reason to wait until it's time to say goodbye to speak the other four.  In that way, we help heal ourselves and others and find joy.  At any age and in difficult times.  

                                                                   In peace, Nina Naomi