JOURNEY OF SELF-PERCEPTION

I'm going to share with you writing prompts for cultivating resilience that are from a project to test the benefits of expressive writing for those in crisis, specifically the COVID-19 crisis.  Although our own crises may not be limited to this pandemic, since many of us live through more than one crisis or trauma in our life and often simultaneously. The writing is only for ourselves and can include the past as we wish.  The instructions are to respond for about 15-20 minutes to each prompt and to do so with patience and compassion for ourselves.   What I'm sharing is an abbreviated version. 

1.   Write about your deepest thoughts and feelings about how this crisis is affecting you personally.  Try to use the time to reflect upon the issues most important to you at this time.  For example, how the crisis is affecting your day-to-day activities, your mental and physical health, your relationships, etc.

2.  Dig deeper.  What fears, difficult emotions and losses have you experienced or do you anticipate?  All emotions are welcome.  (If this becomes too bothersome stop and take a break.  No prompt needs to be completed.  It's up to us based upon the compassion we show ourselves.) 

3.  Now write about your experience from a different perspective:  a wise friend, a future you, a divine or neutral observer or anything that comes to mind.  This could be in the form of a letter to yourself or to someone else, or not.  

4.  Try to tie together the threads of your writing so far into a wish or intention for the future.  What is important to you in continuing to navigate this crisis?  What values matter most right now?  How do you want to relate to yourself and others now and in the future?

5.  Mindful writing:  awareness without judging. impartially witnessing our own experience with compassion.  For ten minutes begin each sentence with "I am aware that. . . " or "I am aware of. . . ."

I liked the last prompt best.  I found so many things I was aware of having to do with my own coping skills and the life I lead that I had not exactly thought of before.  The writing became a positive experience.  See what you think.  

To be continued . . . .

TODAY, A DAY OF NOURISHMENT

Some days I wake up and think no news, just the good stuff.  Admittedly that's easier at the beach.  More good stuff here.  For most of today the sea and sky were the same steely gray.  Nothing wrong with that.  Now it's brighter and there's a horizon in view.  

So what good thing to do on a gray day with an hour or two home alone?  I wrote.  I'm taking part in a clinical study sponsored by Duke Integrative Medicine on the benefits of expressive writing in a time of crisis.   I hadn't before keyed into the idea of expressive writing as writing just for ourselves.  Wide-open, so to speak, about our feelings and emotions rather than factually writing about events, memories, objects or people.  Of course the events, memories, etc. are there, the underpinnings of our feelings.  Our feelings and emotions are about something. 

I didn't write today as part of the study; that writing is only done together, in a weekly 90-minute Zoom session with professionally designed prompts.  But like that writing, this would be read by no one but me. 

One psychologist says that writing can sometimes be better for our mental health than seeing a therapist.  Not sure about that, but I get her point.  It can be hard to be vulnerable and honest with another person, any person. Too many layers, too much background, too expensive, too exposed, possibly hurtful . . . .  But writing what no one else sees can be as honest as our minds are capable of.  A way to process experiences, stressors and thoughts that costs not one penny.  If we're writing about something that bothers us, it's out of our head and on the paper.  I suppose we could even take the paper, fold it up and put it somewhere if we wanted a symbolic action of removal. 

If we're writing our feelings of gratitude, how much more vivid they become when we search and tag our lives for the things that buoy us.  Professionals say that writing improves our immune systems as well as our minds.  I know that I immediately become calmer when I open my Prayer Journal--I remind myself of Pavlov's dogs (or my own):  stimulus/response.  My breathing slows, my body settles in the chair.  Yoga, mindfulness, exercise, prayer, writing, nature, meditation--all benefits to mind, body and spirit.  What else?

So today has been a day of nourishment.  Like the balance I wrote about a couple of days ago ("A Crazy Balanced Life, Even Now," 6/8/20).  The news will be there tomorrow.  For today, writing, a healthy lunch, walking the dog in the rain, publishing this post . . . and it's still early.  I hope all is going well for you too.                          
                                                        Nina Naomi

PS.  "If someone you love, real or imaginary, were feeling just as you are, what encouragement would you give them?"  It's an awesome prompt!  Write for 10 minutes. 

INVESTING IN YOURSELF

So many things to write about.  I've got lists upon lists.  All these blog post themes I keep thinking about, such as: 

Soothe Your Soul

Turn on Your Creative Brain

Find Your Flow

Making Space

Investing in Yourself

The Best Time for New Beginnings

Finding Fresh Headspace

Time to Grow 

All fertile subjects, what I'd like to ponder, look for, find or do and I bet you would too. Who in this world wouldn't?  Hoping to share, to inspire just a little in return for all the inspiration I've received.  To pass on what, over the years, has been given to me.  Such a common goal.  

Lately lists have taken on new meaning in many of our lives.  This is new for me.  Outside of work I haven't been that much of a list maker.  My teenage Diary is more narrative, marked by overstatement and hyperbole. My Prayer Journal has no lists. 

My husband, on the other hand, has kept a red-covered paper date book for each year of his adult life. Everything he's ever done or meant to do--edit a chapter, call the plumber, walk with (name)--is listed, crossed-off or moved forward, a timeline of his existence.  He has a standing order for the same red book every December. The mundane and the private, who he has spent time with or is thinking about, hour after hour, all there revealed.   

But what about lists where nothing has to be scratched off.  I've seen some as writing prompts, some as self-care advice, some in mindfulness workbooks.  These kinds of lists are there for us to retrieve and do with as we will.  Like "Places I want to See" or "Where My Best Memories Were Made" (Ok, on a porch swing--marriage proposal; in Paris--honeymoon; in London--young marrieds; in Blowing Rock, NC--another honeymoon.)  Or "My Favorite Places and Why."  All individualized ways to appreciate our past or plan our future. 

Then there are the more difficult lists, but still helpful.  Lists like "What I Fear" or "Traumas in My Life."  "My Survival Tactics" or "This Helps Me."   I like this last one best.  I'd like to make this list carefully so what helps me will be on mental speed-dial when I need it.  

All these Not-To-Do-Lists not only solidify our memories, but also help us understand ourselves better.  What about this one, "How I Do NOT Want to Be" followed by "How I Want to Be?"  My responses are almost instantaneous for the first list.  I Do Not Want to Be:
Depressed
Anxious
Thoughtless
Unkind

The happier list by far is "How I Want to Be."  This list too comes readily. Because we know how we want our lives to unfold.  For me, I Want to Be: 
Aware
Creative
Peaceful
Grateful
Mindful
Loving
Healthy
Valued
Kind

Helpful
Hopeful

This list is far longer for most of us because it is probably the way we actually are, more often than we always notice.  So, let's pick what we want to list.  If it's not the time to list fears, don't.  If it is the time to list achievements, do.  If it's not the time to face the bad times, don't.  If it is, remember that you are brave, loved, healthy and strong.   

Well, this has turned out to be my Investing in Yourself post.  I didn't know that when I began.  So, I've added the title.  That's what lists can do; help us arrive somewhere. How nice.                                                                                                           Nina Naomi