LIFE IS WAITING FOR YOU

 

I am you and you are me.

We are alone, but not alone. 

We are trapped by time, but also infinite.

Made of flesh but also stars.

This is a quote from Reasons to Stay Alive (2015) by British author Matt Haig (b.1975).  The book is part memoir, part mental health critique, part depression handbook.  The thought in the first line--no more than seven one-syllable words--is unifying and certain.  

I think of God's promise:  "I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you." John 14:18-20.   Poetically, the first two lines also echo Walt Whitman:  

I celebrate myself and sing myself, 

And what I assume you shall assume, 

For every atom belonging to me as good as belongs to you. 

  

Haig underwent a crisis of depression as a young man, as many do at any age, a time when bodies seem heavy, and thoughts mired.  We learned much about these feelings during the worst of the long pandemic, if not before.  It is a mood we fear for those we love and they for us.  For many it stems from grief.  Here is what he says to those so struggling:  

You are on another planet.  

No one understands what you are going through. 

 But actually, they do. 

 You don't think they do because the only reference point is yourself.  

You have never felt this way before, 

and the shock of the descent is traumatizing you, 

but others have been here. 

 You are in a dark, dark land with a population of millions.   

The description of depression as descent into "a dark, dark land" is nevertheless hopeful because we are "in a dark, dark land with a population of millions," others who understand, who have been there, who--like the author of these lines--have survived, and we will too. 

James Baldwin said, "You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read."  Yes, we might read any of the great writers or poets or we might read the Psalms. 

When I am sad my first comfort is always the Lord who shares my feelings with me and lifts me up and out--helps, saves, comforts and defends me.  He has been in this land with the population of millions.  He was, after all, crucified; and thought he was forsaken.  When we are down, life continues on its parallel course, waiting for us to rejoin.  Often what helps is concentrating on something transcendent:  a face we love, special words, the moon and the night sky.  Certain things for each of us, lift our heart.  In the face of what could be despair, to be calm is revolutionary. 

Peonies

One day is bad, but the next is better.  One week or even year is bad, but the next is better.  Beauty cleans the mind of hurts, even of devastations.  The beauty of God's creation, the trees, the stars, the ocean, art, music, literature, those who love us, the children we know . . . . The beauty of confession and forgiveness.  The beauty of hearing (or saying) "I'm so sorry.  I won't do it again."  Haig says, "Made of flesh but also stars."  That's us!

In peace, let us pray to the Lord.  Amen.