I went to church today. There in the shadow of our stained-glass Christ window and before the altar and font, there was no escape: there's been too much horror lately. We Americans are awash in blood and gore. On New Year's Day 5 people were injured in a drive-by shooting at a Subway in my hometown of Durham, NC and I didn't even notice. We've become inured to all but the sickest and most violent crimes.
Wikipedia lists 92 shot dead already in the most ordinary places in America: at a Circle K, in neighborhoods, at a dance studio, in homes, at apartment complexes, on the sidewalk, in cars, on farms, outside restaurants, in malls . . . . For those not directly touched, it feels like just a matter of time.
Somehow, we went a month without a school shooting. That must have been last month. Who can keep track? How many weeks has it been since the University of Idaho stabbings by a criminology graduate student? These 4 deaths will be a TV movie one of these days, like the features about Michael Peterson who ran for mayor of our town and then pushed his wife down their staircase and killed her. The murder scene is not 10 minutes from my home. After 8 years in prison, he was set free by a local judge on a technicality.
On top of shootings, there's police violence. Today we prayed for the community and family of Tyre Nichols of Memphis, his death by fist and boot of the police. Five against one. Like George Floyd, he died crying for his Mama. The officers were more animal than human. I think of the coyotes in our woods killing their prey at night. The video shows blood-thirsty men.
I am embarrassed to have no solutions at all. With nothing to offer, should I even be writing? We are all appalled, all sickened. We run for cover, physically and emotionally.
I began this post thinking about how quickly January has passed. January is to the year like morning is to the day. It's the month we pull back the covers, stretch, look forward and rise and shine. I thought about how we love the short days and long nights. How even as we tuck in, January is more shivery than sluggish. It's a what-do-I-want-the-year-to-be kind of month. But I quickly thought how banal it would be to rhapsodize over winter. Snow, twinkling stars, even Christ himself--nothing will bring these lives back. Wrongful death is an evil, resurrection a distant comfort.
What can we do? Perhaps it's cathartic just to face the evil of the day. Perhaps that is a prerequisite to change. Perhaps there is some value to truth-telling. We know that God works through us. We know that only in God are all things possible. We know that we each have gifts to give at every level, in every home and community to make the world a better place. Let us continue to think and pray about this. So many are capable. Let us pray that we make our country safter for us all, that we become more humane, more caring, that help comes from every source, every mountain, every valley. That we bring wisdom to what is killing us. Let us act. Yes God, please. AMEN
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