CONTENTMENT DOESN'T FALL IN OUR LAPS. LIKE A GARDEN IT HAS TO BE CULTIVATED.

When I opened up an issue of The Simple Things (thesimplethings@icebergpress.co.uk) I saw this page and it triggered this thought about contentment.  So I scribbled the thought on the page.  Shortbread, tea, a lovely book of old-fashioned nature sketches.  How nice to be contented by such simple things.  And how grateful we must be if we have the time for tea, a biscuit and a read. We know that there are lives all over the world where events makes it hard to make a happy home or embrace the ordinary.  We know that if we have the time to read and blog and care for our families and do yoga and play sports and our work is satisfying that we are very, very fortunate.  We hope and pray that our contentment isn't at the expense of others.  That we are thoughtful, charitable, pay fair wages, vote our consciences, work for worthy causes.

Not all phrases we encounter make as much sense.  I recently came across the admonition, "Enjoy life while you're living it."  This struck me as nonsensical.  Why not just "Enjoy Life?" Except that is too simplistic.  What if we have been uprooted?  Or worry about those who have?  What if someone we love seems distant?  Or a child is floundering. What if a friend has cancer? Or we're afraid of aging? Or dying.  Such common problems.  Then it seems to make more sense to cultivate contentment.  Work at it.  Someone said, and I don't know who, "A wise woman takes care of her soul."  This made me think that the greatest contentment comes from emotional safety. Shutting our door at night and feeling comfortable in our solitude.  Or getting into bed with the person we love.  Waking and our sweet pet is there waiting for attention and food.  Being alone but not lonely.  Or with people and not lonely.  Or family and not lonely. Helping when we can and accepting when we cannot.

I was thinking about feelings that slow us down--envy, fear, anxiety, jealousy, fatigue, frustration. . . .   Then how we want to feel--at peace,  loved, appreciated, free, treasured, secure, rested, energized, smart, successful. . . . long lists.  Both lists are legitimate.  They are real and have real, undeniable causes.  Sometimes circumstances must change before we move from feeling anxious to feeling appreciated.  If we are being deceived the deception must stop.  If someone who owes us loyalty is disloyal they must change.  If we are afraid to take action, we must change.  Whatever hurts anyone must stop. 

When gardens are cultivated beautiful flowers grow.  So it's true--contentment doesn't fall into our laps.  It does have to be cultivated.  I bet we are all brave and strong enough to do that.  I bet we are doing that now.  With affection, Nina Naomi

Pierre Bonnard, "Garden," 1935